Oh, how I love to smoke.
But, I’m a Mum. Mums shouldn’t smoke. We all know why: it will encourage our kids to smoke, we could end up in an early grave and that’s not fair on the kids.
People shouldn’t smoke. We all know why: it’s bad for your health, expensive as heck, and antisocial as fuck.
I can’t afford to smoke. I haven’t got time to smoke.
But, sometimes, I smoke.
The thing about fags is, they’re so GOOD. I mean, they taste so nice, if you find a brand you like.
And, the sweet release of the stress of not smoking that is found through the act of smoking is well, kind of amazing.
Your brain lights up. You feel a rush of relief and joy. Sometimes a little woozy which is also fun. *think Phoebe with the head rush*
Even the secret sneaking around the kids so they don’t catch you is fun.
But – it smells. Horrible. And you smell horrible afterwards. And pretty soon after you stub out, you want more. And cravings aren’t fun. Everyone knows cravings. Then comes the irritability you experience when you try to not smoke.
I’ll be vaping again soon. Then back to nothing. It’s just that sometimes, something in life comes around that makes me feel I need to smoke the fuck out of some fags until I feel better, then I quit. Again.
I can quit anytime I want.